((4 points, including 1 for world event. The Golden Dawn, a brutish, occult-rideen political party of the extreme right with offices all over Europe, sweeps to power in Greece admist terrible rioting. Part of their platform openly involves reigning in supernatural beings and powers, of which they accuse the rest of the world of being lax, cowardly and slow. The Party is at the forefront of the first real witch-hunts seen in Europe for almost a thousand years))
Where to begin? For once there's so much to talk about I don't know where to start. Hello, hello from northern Ireland, I suppose. Belfast, actually. I could try to deal with things in order, but uh... order of importance, specifically. First, on the subject of the The Enemy. I think I can say with confidence I've changed my tune. Over the last few months I've seen and experienced more than enough to believe in the final victory. It was ridiculous to assume we could ever talk things out. Rather I'm of the mind our fortunes might someday be wholly reversed. We could do so much more than save Ramira. Ultimately we could carve out whole swaths of territory for ourselves; we could expand and change at the Outsiders' expense. They have nothing to gain by extinguishing the flame of life, where as we have everything to gain if we could devour the void itself and make it our foundation.
Our progenitors the Great Old Ones came very close to realizing this goal before the Shaggoths turned on them, and the Shaggoths have come to regret that development. And even if we ought not to trust them we still have a unique edge this time around. It is certainly true that faith is our chiefest ally. Our quest is for the New Realm and the New Man, and we can find them only through faith. Faith in ourselves will carry us to ultimate victory.
Now uh... perhaps I should regale you with some of my recent exploits. Running damage control in Arkham has been costing me a fortune, but that's over with. I don't like the idea of handing it over to Sea Org but I'd rather not piss them off. We packed up everything we could and hauled it over to the oculory. Shop we've got set up now is a bit modest but we'll be making much better use of it, I promise you that. Cookies are even suggesting we could open up a proper underground resturaunt, bring in some extra money and let us keep tabs on all the 'sorts' passin' through Arhkam. Right now though we're just holding together. What's left of us.
It's funny how so many of us got the idea to head off to Europe at about the same time. Interesting. Tis' what you call a coincidence. Darrel will have left for England or Wales by now. I'd have been in Belfast over a month ago if I could help it. At the moment I'm getting about read to leave for my next stop. I may not have been here very long but I'm sure I left a good impression on the N-I-R-A. In their company, uh... well many false lives have been extinguished. Now I don't have the patience or the time for every little detail, and anyway the whole affair ought rightly to remain hush-hush lest I endanger you all, so instead here's a rundown of exactly the sort of thoughts I was thinking in the order I thought them while I was in mortal danger. You're all intelligent enough to piece things together on your own. Also it was my birthday last month, so consider this my birthday present from me, me, to you. You.
Ahem. Irish cops aren't allowed to carry any guns! They'd rather waste time in the wilderness following a poltergeist blood clot than solve any crimes! They also hang out at the docks welding shit together since they make pretty much no money. They trap their women in a storage hole to protect them from their trouser lust! So, we're gonna' want guns, of course, we're gonna' have to talk to the Cranberries for that. AND we're gonna' want drugs, we're gonna' also have to talk to the Cranberries for THAT. These bro-skates are gonna' have to get really fuckin' high to deal with United Irish isles. This place freakin' sucks and I'm going to have to inject a TON of [REDACTED]. Are they really gonna' try and pidgeon-dick me into one of THESE shity rolls? They even have trentals in this town. That's what they call them over here. Trentals.
Oh no, ghosts and badguys came! Ring the dinner bell, it's time for your shit! Look at these jokers, everyone stays just followin' each other around, it's 'cause Irish people STILL don't have their independence! Whatever, just dose up and forget about it, mate. And never shake that gory bridge at me. NEVER SHAKE! Irish people would interrupt the best gym job of their lives to go to church. Dammit it's so dark it's harder to tell what's going than a pregnancy test, which I could deal with if I wasn't gonna' be a DAD soon!
The stockings get hung by the chimney with kerosine, cause Irish people only like that shit when it burns! Dangit I told you idiots if you just stay together you're gonna' be a bunch of sitting dogs! You gotta' split up and go in the darkness so they approach you in a line single file. So you're dead, stupid, I know how to work every weapon that was ever born! Damn, Christmas Cracker, a white person's worst nightmare.
Suddenly from the menstrual miasma they strike! Do you even want to know what THAT is?
I think that about covers it, honestly. Part one of my little holiday is now successfully complete. Next stop will be to the south-west, followed by a trip to the Black Forest, then Lapland, and finally northern Russia. Seeing a pattern? I wish I'd thought of Europe months ago. Vampires. Werewolves. The Hosts of Heaven. My sort of crowd; exultant, ruthless and VIRILE! Actually if I can I'm going to try and make my way yo Greece. You have heard a thing or two about the Golden Dawn. Securing their good offices might allow us to finally ween ourselves off the puss-laden teet of Scientology. Naveou Europa! The Kingdom of Noise TREMBLES at our advance.
Happy hunting, gentlemen. Your affectionate comrade, A. A. Merit.
No comments:
Post a Comment